UC: Stuck

A Planet-Man made poster for you all to enjoy

UCSTUCK1.jpg

My head is on a woman.

...

Women are gross.
 
Ultimate Quicksilver is pregnant... :lol:

I'm Locke. I rule.
 
And notice how I made Tog a woman, thus ending the debate forever.

Ultimate Houde said:
E: I see you figured out how to get the biscuits.
Planet-Man: I know, you press the button and the biscuits come out.

I'm so smart.:D

And speaking of which, I have two new theories about the story:

1) J. Agamemnon = J. J. Abrams


2) (brace yourself) The castaways..........




















ARE ALL IN PURGATORY!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
And notice how I made Tog a woman, thus ending the debate forever.



I'm so smart.:D

And speaking of which, I have two new theories about the story:

1) J. Agamemnon = J. J. Abrams


2) (brace yourself) The castaways..........























ARE ALL IN PURGATORY!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh.My.God..... I call him my J.J. Beans. But, who is Abrams?

EDIT: Us ladies got to stick together. If I wasn't such a prude at times, I would say smother his face in bossoms and make him scream like the gay guys on straight eye for the queer guy.
 
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The Wandering Tale of VVD


Voice: Yo, VVD, Yo man, wake up, he's back man, still gunning to get you.

VVD wearily opened his eyes, adjusting them to the light. He was in his friend's apartment, hiding out from the law. Looking out the window, he saw a man standing there the dreaded bounty hunter known as Nurhachi.

Nurhachi: VVD! GET OUT HERE, I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE BRAH!

VVD's eyes got big, and he went to go out the back. As he jumped out the window, he landed on a beach, in tropical weather. Mystified, he looked around, at the surf, and the wreckage, and the twelve newest fires made by Gamma Man and Sjmole.

VVD: They made a fire out of seaweed, those useless pieces of…

He turned around, and found himself face to face with bounty hunter Nurhachi.

Nurhachi: Did you think killing me and ditching me in a landfill was going to stop me from finding you brah? Did you really?

VVD screamed.

The encampment our intrepid survivors are at

Voice: Wake up man, Baxter's back. Wake up.

VVD woke up, and shook his head, and store at the face of ProjectX2.

VVD: What?
Project: Baxter's back man, and he's got some info about what he found and where Houde is.
VVD: Alright, I'm coming….wait…..have you seen any other Bounty Hunters on the island?
Project: Um, nope….maybe Baxter or MwoF have, they traveled out of the camp site and into the woods, I Can ask them…
VVD: No, don't, it's okay, I'll just…ask them myself.
Project: Okay, you sure you alright.
VVD: Yeah, you just startled me, that's all.
Project: Okay, I must have startled that accent right out of you, it's been three minutes and you haven't said brah yet.
VVD: Yeah, you did, good one brah,

Shanty Town

E stood over the dead body in front of him.

E: And which one was this may I ask?

Ricky, Shanty Town's number one security expert, looked at the body.

Ricky: Um..J Afjhaslh*cough*

E gave him a stern look.

E: You have no idea, do you?
Ricky: Well, not really some much as don't know, as in I have no idea.
E: Why did I hire you?
Ricky: To be fair boss, it's because I make one hell of an appletini.
E: Oh yes, you do don't you. And how did you get this position?
Ricky: I bribed the people to vote for me by making appletini's….um..sir.
E: Right, good point, good point. You are fired.
Ricky: Wait, come on, give me a chance.
E: Fine, you get the one who found our encampment, and then you also get Project, since Houde won't talk, and then…What is it?
Ricky: Um….I was hoping to put a camera up in the tree and that be it you know?

E stared at him

E: No
Ricky: But with the camera we could see that angle and stuff…
E: No.
Ricky: Maybe a lawn ornament with a hidden blow dart
E: No, get the two people I asked for, you freaking idiot. I'm going to check on this Planet-Man.
Ricky: Fine, you never let me install anything fun anyways…

E walked off and to the cage that held Planet-Ma, the prisoner him and Bass found in the jungle knocked out by one of their awesome traps.

E: They were awesome…
Bass: What was sir?
E: Our traps, how is the prisoner doing.
Bass: He's doing well, I gave him a mentos, he had bad breath
E: Well, thoughtful of you Bass
Bass: I thought so, but really, I was being selfish cause I didn't want to deal with bad breath sir
E: okay…and the prisoner?
Bass: He's selling insurance to Selfproclaimed.
E: He's what?
Bass: Selling insurance?
E: For what I ask with trepidation?
Bass: Hidden island insurance Big Man, in case of a volcano explosion
E: You bought some didn't you?
Bass: Hell yea I did, with premium coverage.
E: Everyone I coerced to work with me are idiots….
Bass: Well, you'll be sorry when the island explodes and I get a new one and you don't

Encampment

Zombipanda: I KNEW YOU WERE A BAD GUY!
McCheese: Kick him in the nuts!
Random: YES! Kick his…wait, isn't that severe…
Moonmaster: I kicked him in the nuts once already
Ice: ONCE! You never stopped until someone sprayed water on you.
Moonmaster: Damn that water sprayer. Once I overcome that fear, I'm going to so kick you in the nuts again
Baxter: Down Moonmaster

Baxter, and his group of people he found, where interrogating the two traitors, Cad and Ice. So far, they only got those damn numbers out of them.

Baxter: Now, I ran into some people I knew before I came here, and you two good sirs are going to tell me why they were here.
Ice: Not if I don't want too.
Cad: I'm allergic to truth.
McCheese: Wow, that's something I would say.
Zombipanda: Wait, how do you two know each other again?
Baxter: I told you already.
Random: It happened about ten minutes ago, remember.

Ten Minutes ago

Zombipanda: Wait, how do you two know each other?
Baxter: He frequents a brothel I go too.
McCheese: Yea, he showed up one time, and there was mail for him. He couldn't afford any of the girls to go, so I went.
Zombipanda: You worked at a Brothel?
McCheese: No, but that would be awesome.
Zombipanda: I'm confused.

Present[

Zombipanda: Oh
Baxter: You were trying to trip us up, weren't you?

VVD and Project entered.

VVD: Hey Bax, who are these guys?
Baxter: The shifty one is Zombipanda, the other one with the stupid expression is Random, and that over there is McCheese, he's a bum that lives in the town I grew up in.
McCheese: Yeah, he got this strange invite in the cardboard box he frequents on Tuesday and Friday nights. I came along because I love crabcakes.
VVD: Going with the different answer everytime someone asks the question, huh?
Baxter: Yup
VVD: Cool brahs, welcome.
Zombipanda: You don't look Hawaiian
VVD: Go with Christ brah
Zombipanda: Works for me.
Ice: You serious? That's it? You were up my *** for days!
Zombipanda: Well, your story never checked.
Ice: We are on a deserted and hidden island in the Mississippi river, how did my story not check out?
Zombipanda: Hey, keep talking and I'll find out, the hard way, whether or not you are really Hispanic.
Random: Wait, he's Hispanic? I thought he was a short tanned white guy
McCheese: That's so confusing.
Ice: What's the hard way?
Cad: Figures, silly Americans threatening us with stupid little threats. I'm surprised the great country of Australia hasn't conquered you guys yet.
Project: New Zealand is so much better than Australia
Cad: BLASHPHEMER!
VVD: This is getting us nowhere, everyone who isn't tied up or black leave now, I'll handle this.
 
Zombipanda: I KNEW YOU WERE A BAD GUY!
McCheese: Kick him in the nuts!
Random: YES! Kick his…wait, isn't that severe…
Moonmaster: I kicked him in the nuts once already
Ice: ONCE! You never stopped until someone sprayed water on you.
Moonmaster: Damn that water sprayer. Once I overcome that fear, I'm going to so kick you in the nuts again
Baxter: Down Moonmaster

Greatness
 
Cad: I'm allergic to truth.
McCheese: Wow, that's something I would say.
:lol: :lol: :lol:
Zombipanda: Wait, how do you two know each other again?
Baxter: I told you already.
Random: It happened about ten minutes ago, remember.

Ten Minutes ago

Zombipanda: Wait, how do you two know each other?
Baxter: He frequents a brothel I go too.
McCheese: Yea, he showed up one time, and there was mail for him. He couldn't afford any of the girls to go, so I went.
Zombipanda: You worked at a Brothel?
McCheese: No, but that would be awesome.
Zombipanda: I'm confused.

Present[

Zombipanda: Oh
Baxter: You were trying to trip us up, weren't you?

VVD and Project entered.

VVD: Hey Bax, who are these guys?
Baxter: The shifty one is Zombipanda, the other one with the stupid expression is Random, and that over there is McCheese, he's a bum that lives in the town I grew up in.
McCheese: Yeah, he got this strange invite in the cardboard box he frequents on Tuesday and Friday nights. I came along because I love crabcakes.
VVD: Going with the different answer everytime someone asks the question, huh?
Baxter: Yup
VVD: Cool brahs, welcome.
So Bax and I know each other, but we give a different answer as to how every time?


Brilliant!!!!
 
After some grumbling from everyone, they all left. As everyone left, Moonmaster leaned over to whisper in VVD's ear.

Moonmaster: If you need someone to kick them in the balls, I'm right outside.
VVD: No way brah, but tell you what, go kick Gamma-Man ad Sjmole in the balls would ya, they were trying to start a fire based on a Who am I game.
Moonmaster: Right-eo

Moonmaster left, and VVD smiled at the two traitors.

VVD: Now, what's up with this place, why am I seeing a dead guy?
Cad: Why should I tell you? Huh?
VVD: Cause, I happen to have some Bear Mace, and not afraid to use it.
Cad: Do your worst, I'll never talk
VVD: Oh, you I'm just going to torture, and then he'll talk.
Cad: You…you evil genius.
VVD: Stop the flattering.

Taking out a hammer he somehow secreted on his person, he stuck a tooth between the metal parts on the backside of a hammer.

VVD: Time for some tooth torture.
Ice: We have no idea! We had a scientist working on it, but he died, that's why we stole Houde, to have him figure out what was going on.
VVD: Damn man, I didn't even get to do anything
Ice: I'm fragile
Cad: I hate Americans.

Baxter and his new group walked off to discuss plans on how to get out of where they were, meanwhile, Moonmaster located his friend TGO, who was mad at someone.

TGO: Dammit Gamma-Man, why did you make a fire with Tissues. I needed those!
Moonmaster: What's going on?
TGO: This stupid Gamma-Man, he made a fire out of my tissues!
Moonmaster: HA!
Gamma-Man: I also made a fire with these small slips of paper with strange symbols on them….
Moonmaster: MY SIGILS!

TGO and Moonmaster looked back at each other.

TGO: I'll kick him, you hold him, then we switch.
Moonmaster: Deal.
Gamma-Man: Are you guys hugging me?
TGO: No, we are hurting you.
Gamma-Man: I love hugs!

One of those flashback thingys again

Nurhachi: VVD! GET OUT HERE, I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE BRAH!

VVD frantically looked around the house he was holed up in. There was very little in escape routes, so he went out back, and jumped out a window. Landing on a dumpster, and rolling, he came up on his feet, running.

He didn't get to far. As he got up, he got clotheslined in the neck by the arm of Nurhachi.

Nurhachi: Think you were going to get far brah?

VVD coughed, hacked, wheezed and cursed his luck.

Nurhachi: You slipped on your bail brah, and I've come all the way from Hawaii to arrest you. Now what I can't get is why you skipped on the your probation, you only had a few days left on it.
VVD: Looking for….my kid….he was kidnapped.
Nurhachi: That's a new one. Well, brah, I'll give you credit for that excuse.

He brought VVD to his feet, and something fell out of his pocket. It was a note, a ransom note for VVD's kid.

Nurhachi: Your kid's name is the Captain? The Captain of what?
VVD: THE CAPTAIN!
Nurhachi: Okay….Brah, I believe Christ directs us. He led me to you, and now, we'll go get your kid back, got it brah? But you have to come back with me to Hawaii brah.
VVD: Agreed.
Nurhachi: Now, we need to get you a bullet proof vest and some bear mace…

Present
At the Encampment


VVD walked out of the tent.

Dr.Strangefate: DO any of them need my expertise?
VVD: Only if they buy a new pair of shoes. The whiny one broke first, and told me a lot. Basically said that a Man simply known as E has been recruiting people fr a sinister purpose. He says he doesn't know what that purpose is.
Project: I knew something was fishy.
Baxter: So, what should we do.

VVD was all for attacking this E before someone else was killed in there camp, but then he saw Nurhachi standing in the forest. Beckoning him.

VVD: Um…I need to go for a walk and think about it.

VVD left the confused trio as he ran into the woods, and on the way, he passed Moonmaster ad TGO.

Moonmaster: What is he doing?
TGO: He thinks we are bullies, and is standing up to us I think…
Moonmaster: Aw, that's cute….HIT HIM IN THE JAW!
TGO: Booya!

VVD followed what he could see of Nurhachi, one hand this way, a sleeve over here, a glimpse of an offered cigarette there, until he ran full tilt into a person.

MWoF

VVD: MWoF? What are you doing here?
MWoF: Seems to me, following you. By the way, did Baxter bring back ay booze?
VVD: No idea…hey…you said you knew I wasn't a bounty hunter right?
MWoF: Yup

VVD punched MWoF in the jaw, knocking out the drunk.

VVD: Sorry man, no one can know….
 

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