TheManWithoutFear
#1 reason not to join UC
I was gonna comment on the Daredevil would have known before hand but you got that covered pretty well. Good read. I'll check in on the next chapter.
Sensational Spider-Man
- Thread starter Ice
- Start date
Ice
Teh Sexy Monkey Queen
Chameleon turned it on right before he left, and right before the real Spider-Man showed up and destroyed it. With DD in pain, he couldn't tell that the fake Spidey left, so he thought the real on was the one he was fighting before.René said:
René said:
Thank you. I aim to please. :wink:TheManWithoutFear said:
Nurhachi
Well-Known Member
Nice explanation dude, good story 
ProjectX2
Don't expect me to take you with me when I go to s
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- Sep 15, 2004
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- 25,007
Cool. It's your best Spidey issue yet. I liked DD's appearance as well.
Ice
Teh Sexy Monkey Queen
Well, while I wait for any other reviews, I thought I'd post the next solit.
Sensational Spider-Man #4
Written and cover put together by: Icemastertron
This is it. Spider-Man has finally learned who was responsible for the taking of MJ. But will also finding out that he has the choice of either getting MJ, and not deal with the mastermind, be the end? Find out, as the villain is finally revealed!
Sensational Spider-Man #4
Written and cover put together by: Icemastertron
This is it. Spider-Man has finally learned who was responsible for the taking of MJ. But will also finding out that he has the choice of either getting MJ, and not deal with the mastermind, be the end? Find out, as the villain is finally revealed!
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Nurhachi
Well-Known Member
Woohooo The villain will be revealed. Also nice cover I miss the Ben Rielly costume
I miss the Ben Rielly costume
Seldes Katne
Site mom
Aaaarrrrggghhh! :arrgh: Cliff-hanger again! (You know, you're really getting good at these. Have you thought much about writing for television?)
This was fast-paced. Almost a little too fast-paced—there seemed to be almost nothing but action here. That's okay, you don't want your audience to fall asleep in an action/adventure story, but you do want your characters to be able to breathe once in a while. (No wonder Daredevil had no trouble telling which Spider-man was Peter and which was the imposter—Peter's been running since the beginning of the chapter! I'm surprised Daredevil couldn't hear my heartrate in the background by the end of this chapter....I'm exhausted after reading this!)
This was fast-paced. Almost a little too fast-paced—there seemed to be almost nothing but action here. That's okay, you don't want your audience to fall asleep in an action/adventure story, but you do want your characters to be able to breathe once in a while.
(No wonder Daredevil had no trouble telling which Spider-man was Peter and which was the imposter—Peter's been running since the beginning of the chapter! I'm surprised Daredevil couldn't hear my heartrate in the background by the end of this chapter....I'm exhausted after reading this!)Well, that's the pot calling the kettle black....
:dazed: Um, was that English?
I think Spider-man's going a little overboard on the nicknames, there. Daredevil might just kick his posterior on general principles for this.
Does UltimateE really talk like this? :shock: I don't think I've ever seen him use the word "amigo"....
Ice
Teh Sexy Monkey Queen
There's a thought!Seldes Katne said:
Breathe in....Breathe out....Breathe in....Breathe out....Seldes Katne said:This was fast-paced. Almost a little too fast-paced—there seemed to be almost nothing but action here. That's okay, you don't want your audience to fall asleep in an action/adventure story, but you do want your characters to be able to breathe once in a while.
Ain't it?Seldes Katne said:
Our top government scientists are still trying to figure that one out, unfortunately.Seldes Katne said:
A little? Isn't Spider-Man always like that?Seldes Katne said:I think Spider-man's going a little overboard on the nicknames, there. Daredevil might just kick his posterior on general principles for this.
My UltimateE does. :wink:Seldes Katne said:
Seldes Katne
Site mom
Ah, poetic license -- it's a beautiful thing. :wink:icemastertron said:
Ice
Teh Sexy Monkey Queen
Web of Lies: Conclusion
This is it, ladies and gents. The CONCLUSION to the first arc of SENSATIONAL SPIDER-MAN! See what goes down and who the mastermind behind all this was! Be prepared!
So read, enjoy, and post ALL of your thoughts!
Spider-Man sat on top of a rooftop, thinking about the name he found, not long ago. As nighttime was soon on its way, Spider-Man just awaited the sunset.
HIM! I can't believe it's him! I thought... ..damn it I thought wrong. This just goes to show that seems anyone can just backstab you.
"HELP! SOMEONE HELP!" A woman cried out, not far from where Spider-Man sat. Spider-Man looked around, but saw no signs of any danger around. Then, his Spider-sense went off.
"What the?!" Spider-Man turned around to see bolts of electricity coming at him. He dodged out the way, and flipped onto the next corner of the building.
"Electro!"
"Fancy meetin' you here, you brainless wall-crawler!" Electro moved closer to Spider-Man, while his fists had electricity moving all over them.
"WO! Hold on there, sparky! You should really think this through. I mean, I know that lightning shock that went through that wire cable gave you your powers and fried your brain like scrambled eggs-"
"SHUT UP! JUST…SHUT UP! I've had it with you always messing up my plans and-" Electro shouted shooting out bolts after bolts at Spider-Man.
Dodging them, Spider-Man replied, "Hey! We've only met up like, let me see…1…2…3…no wait, that wasn't you…well, it's 3 with this visit."
"GAH!" Electro then shot more bolts of electricity at Spider-Man, but again, Spider-Man dodged them. But Electro was expecting, of course, for Spider-Man to move to either side to miss his attack. So Electro shot even more bolts, with more power, to each side.
So Spider-Man was hit with the bolts, and he fell to the rooftop's ground, hard. Electro, with an evil grin on his face, walked over to Spider-Man, as Spider-Man was twitching a little bit.
"Did someone get the license of that truck that hit me?" Spider-Man asked, sounding like he was drunk.
"At last, you will no longer be a nuisance to me." Electro then charged up more electricity, as his body was now covered in it. He then shot one large blast at Spider-Man, as he heard his scream.
"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Spider-Man was in pain; first time he felt truly close to death.
"Got…to…help…the…womaaaaaaaah!
While shocking Spider-Man more, Electro told him, "Please, there is no woman. It's just a tape you little idiot!!"
As Electro was going to hit Spider-Man with more, someone came out of nowhere, and kicked Electro in the head.
Spider-Man was too weak to get up, and couldn't really see anything. So he didn't see who the person was that saved him.
Once Spider-Man was able to get up, a little while later, he saw a note that was left behind, that only said "MEOW".
"This is just wasting my time!" Spider-Man said in anger. "I need to find MJ. I need to know where the hell she is! There's only one place they'll have Chameleon. Let's see if he's awake now."
Rikers Island, 10 minutes later-
Geez, it ain't easy trying to find a ride here. Good thing there's always at least one news chopper flying around.
Spider-Man crawled up the prison's walls, dodging every light, so he wouldn't get caught. Being wanted as a vigilante is one thing, but breaking and entering would for sure not be good to my rep. Jonah would have a field day!, Spider-Man thought to himself.
Once Spider-Man was in, he crawled on the ceiling, staying in the dark areas. He went to the security room, to find Chameleon's cell. As he slowly came down on a web line, upside down, he looked around to see if he saw Chameleon anywhere.
"Cell 5B." Spider-Man said , out loud.
"Huh? Who's there?" The security guard asked, frightened. He turned around to see no one was there.
"I got to stop eating those British beans."
"Hello, Spider-Man. Yes, I know you're there." Chameleon said as he turned to his cell's window, after putting down the pieces of a puzzle he was working on.
"OK, now guess what the lotto number's are. I want to be a millionaire, too."
"What do you want Spider-Man? And you should talk fast, the guards will come back from their break soon, and I know you have webbed the camera."
"Where's the girl? What have you done with her?" Spider-Man asked him, now in a serious tone.
"Why would you care? Is she your girlfriend? Oh wait, you're just a goody-two shoes. You'll do anything nice."
"Chameleon, so help me God, if you don't tell me where she is I'll-"
"You'll what Spider-Man? Kill me? That'll be the day."
"I thought you said he'll get you no matter what. So why not keep telling me what I want to know?"
"He called me Spider-Man. He told me he forgave me, and that he'll help me escape this place."
"And you believed him?"
"You dare say he lied to me?"
"Think about it. You're in prison now. What can stop him from having someone here kill you, to get rid of you and not have any ties to you. To make sure you won't talk. I know who he is. You really think he'll protect you?"
Chameleon was silent. Out of anger, he threw the puzzle pieces that were on the desk he was sitting at.
"No! You're…you're lying!"
"Am I? I'm a "goody-two shoes", remember? Why would I lie?"
Again, Chameleon was silent. He then took out a piece of paper, and wrote something one it. He showed it to Spider-Man, and it read:
"There's only one thing Spider-Man."
"And that is?"
"Don't go after him."
"Why do you say that?"
"Spider-Man, I know what he's been doing. He's been setting your friend, Peter Parker, to loose all his loved ones, if you ever try to cross the wrong path with him."
"I think I can handle this."
"No, Spider-Man, you can't. Trust me, if you value life, don't do this."
Now it was Spider-Man who was silent. The guards were coming back from their break, so Spider-Man left. As the guards turned the corner and looked into Chameleon's cell, they saw the mess he made.
"Aww, what happened? Couldn't find the corner pieces? HAHAHAHA!"
"You fools will pay. Just wait and see."
"Shut your trap hole, you bald piece of %$^#."
Meanwhile-
As Spider-Man swung through the city, he thought to himself, How did he get all this information about me? About MJ, Aunt May. Who else does he have information on? Could he have information on Gwen? No, he can't. She moved to Paris years ago, right after high school. Or he could…Damn him! Maybe Chameleon's right. If I go after him, he'll probably come after MJ again. Probably kill her. There's the place. Oh dear God, let me MJ be fine.
Spider-Man swung down, to the place where Chameleon told him. He then heard someone coming towards him. Thinking it might be someone coming to attack him, he turned around and shot his webs.
"MORONIC IDIOT!"
It was only Daredevil.
"Sorry d-cup. Thought it was someone coming to attack me."
"Just get the hell out my way." And with that, Daredevil disappeared into the night.
Spider-Man then went up to the code pad, as he typed '616HOM'. The light on the pad lit green, and the door's lock automatically unlocked itself. Spider-Man then went to open the door, and went inside.
The warehouse was big. Bigger than two university labs. It just a lot of crates and boxes, everywhere. Could MJ be in one of those?, Spider-Man thought. He looked around, as he screamed MJ's name.
"MARY JANE! MARY JANE!"
No answer. He then tried again.
"MARY JANE! CAN YOU HEAR ME? MAAARY JAAANE!"
Still nothing.
"That idiot better not have lied to me."
Suddenly, there was noise coming from behind him. But it wasn't in any of the crates or boxes. The noise was coming from a room, in the top floor. Spider-Man swung up, and tried to open the door, but it was locked.
So he took a step back, and kicked the door open. The room was someone's office. And the noise was coming from the chair, which faced opposite the desk.
As Spider-Man went to check, he saw that it was MJ making the noise. She was gagged and tied up tight, with rope.
"MJ!" He yelled in relief. He quickly ripped off the rope off her hands and feet, and took off the gag.
"Oh my God, MJ! I'm so sorry!"
"Please, just…just take me home." MJ said as she burst into tears.
Spider-Man took, her, and left for home.
The next day-
"Spider-Man. Oh, how you will pay. You've managed to ruin everything. From my life, to my plans. It's your fault I'm the man I am today. That accident was your doing, and you did it to sabotage me! Trust me Spider-Man, the day will come when I will kill you."
"Sir." Someone said over a phone speaker.
"Yes, what is it, Clarice?"
"Just wanted to let you know, Peppy Pots has packed her stuff. She left for Stark Industries."
"That's fine. She wasn't a worthy asset to our company."
"Oh, sir, one more thing."
"Yes, Clarice?"
"You're two o'clock is here."
"Thank you. You can send him in."
"Ah, Mr. Stane, how are you?"
"I'm fine. Thank you for asking….Mr. Osborn."
This is it, ladies and gents. The CONCLUSION to the first arc of SENSATIONAL SPIDER-MAN! See what goes down and who the mastermind behind all this was! Be prepared!
So read, enjoy, and post ALL of your thoughts!
Chapter 4-
Web of Lies: Conclusion
Web of Lies: Conclusion
Spider-Man sat on top of a rooftop, thinking about the name he found, not long ago. As nighttime was soon on its way, Spider-Man just awaited the sunset.
HIM! I can't believe it's him! I thought... ..damn it I thought wrong. This just goes to show that seems anyone can just backstab you.
"HELP! SOMEONE HELP!" A woman cried out, not far from where Spider-Man sat. Spider-Man looked around, but saw no signs of any danger around. Then, his Spider-sense went off.
"What the?!" Spider-Man turned around to see bolts of electricity coming at him. He dodged out the way, and flipped onto the next corner of the building.
"Electro!"
"Fancy meetin' you here, you brainless wall-crawler!" Electro moved closer to Spider-Man, while his fists had electricity moving all over them.
"WO! Hold on there, sparky! You should really think this through. I mean, I know that lightning shock that went through that wire cable gave you your powers and fried your brain like scrambled eggs-"
"SHUT UP! JUST…SHUT UP! I've had it with you always messing up my plans and-" Electro shouted shooting out bolts after bolts at Spider-Man.
Dodging them, Spider-Man replied, "Hey! We've only met up like, let me see…1…2…3…no wait, that wasn't you…well, it's 3 with this visit."
"GAH!" Electro then shot more bolts of electricity at Spider-Man, but again, Spider-Man dodged them. But Electro was expecting, of course, for Spider-Man to move to either side to miss his attack. So Electro shot even more bolts, with more power, to each side.
So Spider-Man was hit with the bolts, and he fell to the rooftop's ground, hard. Electro, with an evil grin on his face, walked over to Spider-Man, as Spider-Man was twitching a little bit.
"Did someone get the license of that truck that hit me?" Spider-Man asked, sounding like he was drunk.
"At last, you will no longer be a nuisance to me." Electro then charged up more electricity, as his body was now covered in it. He then shot one large blast at Spider-Man, as he heard his scream.
"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Spider-Man was in pain; first time he felt truly close to death.
"Got…to…help…the…womaaaaaaaah!
While shocking Spider-Man more, Electro told him, "Please, there is no woman. It's just a tape you little idiot!!"
As Electro was going to hit Spider-Man with more, someone came out of nowhere, and kicked Electro in the head.
Spider-Man was too weak to get up, and couldn't really see anything. So he didn't see who the person was that saved him.
Once Spider-Man was able to get up, a little while later, he saw a note that was left behind, that only said "MEOW".
"This is just wasting my time!" Spider-Man said in anger. "I need to find MJ. I need to know where the hell she is! There's only one place they'll have Chameleon. Let's see if he's awake now."
Rikers Island, 10 minutes later-
Geez, it ain't easy trying to find a ride here. Good thing there's always at least one news chopper flying around.
Spider-Man crawled up the prison's walls, dodging every light, so he wouldn't get caught. Being wanted as a vigilante is one thing, but breaking and entering would for sure not be good to my rep. Jonah would have a field day!, Spider-Man thought to himself.
Once Spider-Man was in, he crawled on the ceiling, staying in the dark areas. He went to the security room, to find Chameleon's cell. As he slowly came down on a web line, upside down, he looked around to see if he saw Chameleon anywhere.
"Cell 5B." Spider-Man said , out loud.
"Huh? Who's there?" The security guard asked, frightened. He turned around to see no one was there.
"I got to stop eating those British beans."
"Hello, Spider-Man. Yes, I know you're there." Chameleon said as he turned to his cell's window, after putting down the pieces of a puzzle he was working on.
"OK, now guess what the lotto number's are. I want to be a millionaire, too."
"What do you want Spider-Man? And you should talk fast, the guards will come back from their break soon, and I know you have webbed the camera."
"Where's the girl? What have you done with her?" Spider-Man asked him, now in a serious tone.
"Why would you care? Is she your girlfriend? Oh wait, you're just a goody-two shoes. You'll do anything nice."
"Chameleon, so help me God, if you don't tell me where she is I'll-"
"You'll what Spider-Man? Kill me? That'll be the day."
"I thought you said he'll get you no matter what. So why not keep telling me what I want to know?"
"He called me Spider-Man. He told me he forgave me, and that he'll help me escape this place."
"And you believed him?"
"You dare say he lied to me?"
"Think about it. You're in prison now. What can stop him from having someone here kill you, to get rid of you and not have any ties to you. To make sure you won't talk. I know who he is. You really think he'll protect you?"
Chameleon was silent. Out of anger, he threw the puzzle pieces that were on the desk he was sitting at.
"No! You're…you're lying!"
"Am I? I'm a "goody-two shoes", remember? Why would I lie?"
Again, Chameleon was silent. He then took out a piece of paper, and wrote something one it. He showed it to Spider-Man, and it read:
DOCK 5
PIER 17
WARE HOUSE 5-2
CODE NUMBER 616HOM
PIER 17
WARE HOUSE 5-2
CODE NUMBER 616HOM
"There's only one thing Spider-Man."
"And that is?"
"Don't go after him."
"Why do you say that?"
"Spider-Man, I know what he's been doing. He's been setting your friend, Peter Parker, to loose all his loved ones, if you ever try to cross the wrong path with him."
"I think I can handle this."
"No, Spider-Man, you can't. Trust me, if you value life, don't do this."
Now it was Spider-Man who was silent. The guards were coming back from their break, so Spider-Man left. As the guards turned the corner and looked into Chameleon's cell, they saw the mess he made.
"Aww, what happened? Couldn't find the corner pieces? HAHAHAHA!"
"You fools will pay. Just wait and see."
"Shut your trap hole, you bald piece of %$^#."
Meanwhile-
As Spider-Man swung through the city, he thought to himself, How did he get all this information about me? About MJ, Aunt May. Who else does he have information on? Could he have information on Gwen? No, he can't. She moved to Paris years ago, right after high school. Or he could…Damn him! Maybe Chameleon's right. If I go after him, he'll probably come after MJ again. Probably kill her. There's the place. Oh dear God, let me MJ be fine.
Spider-Man swung down, to the place where Chameleon told him. He then heard someone coming towards him. Thinking it might be someone coming to attack him, he turned around and shot his webs.
"MORONIC IDIOT!"
It was only Daredevil.
"Sorry d-cup. Thought it was someone coming to attack me."
"Just get the hell out my way." And with that, Daredevil disappeared into the night.
Spider-Man then went up to the code pad, as he typed '616HOM'. The light on the pad lit green, and the door's lock automatically unlocked itself. Spider-Man then went to open the door, and went inside.
The warehouse was big. Bigger than two university labs. It just a lot of crates and boxes, everywhere. Could MJ be in one of those?, Spider-Man thought. He looked around, as he screamed MJ's name.
"MARY JANE! MARY JANE!"
No answer. He then tried again.
"MARY JANE! CAN YOU HEAR ME? MAAARY JAAANE!"
Still nothing.
"That idiot better not have lied to me."
Suddenly, there was noise coming from behind him. But it wasn't in any of the crates or boxes. The noise was coming from a room, in the top floor. Spider-Man swung up, and tried to open the door, but it was locked.
So he took a step back, and kicked the door open. The room was someone's office. And the noise was coming from the chair, which faced opposite the desk.
As Spider-Man went to check, he saw that it was MJ making the noise. She was gagged and tied up tight, with rope.
"MJ!" He yelled in relief. He quickly ripped off the rope off her hands and feet, and took off the gag.
"Oh my God, MJ! I'm so sorry!"
"Please, just…just take me home." MJ said as she burst into tears.
Spider-Man took, her, and left for home.
The next day-
"Spider-Man. Oh, how you will pay. You've managed to ruin everything. From my life, to my plans. It's your fault I'm the man I am today. That accident was your doing, and you did it to sabotage me! Trust me Spider-Man, the day will come when I will kill you."
"Sir." Someone said over a phone speaker.
"Yes, what is it, Clarice?"
"Just wanted to let you know, Peppy Pots has packed her stuff. She left for Stark Industries."
"That's fine. She wasn't a worthy asset to our company."
"Oh, sir, one more thing."
"Yes, Clarice?"
"You're two o'clock is here."
"Thank you. You can send him in."
"Ah, Mr. Stane, how are you?"
"I'm fine. Thank you for asking….Mr. Osborn."
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I liked the Electro scene in particular but this had a number of very good scenes. You'd thought out the plot and I noticed a few subliminal messages and references, as well as one insanely geeky one that you pointed out to me. It was good that the villain "got away with it" after a fashion too
Nurhachi
Well-Known Member
icemastertron said:
Thats a new one :lol:
good chapter as usual. Wonder what will happen with Osborn
Ice
Teh Sexy Monkey Queen
Well, when you feel you have no time left to leave, because you failed someone, and then they lie and betray you, wouldn't you do it too? :wink:René said:
And no one asked about that mysterious note left to Spider-Man. Anyone want to take a guess as to who it came from?
And about that code....
Nurhachi
Well-Known Member
the code
616HOM
616 House of M?
Black Cat would have left that note
616HOM
616 House of M?
Black Cat would have left that note
Ice
Teh Sexy Monkey Queen
René said:
YES! Black Cat did leave the note!Nurhachi said:
and
Nurhachi said:
YES! YES! YES!
You got it, guys!
ProjectX2
Don't expect me to take you with me when I go to s
- Joined
- Sep 15, 2004
- Messages
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A cool conclusion to the arc. Some scenes were familiar (like the Chameleon at Rikers. MKSM!) But nonetheless, iot was good. Looking forward to Osborn...
Seldes Katne
Site mom
I'm going to go out on a limb here and say there's a sequel being planned. Aside from the last scene, we have Spider-man's mysterious rescuer, and Electro still seems to be running around loose, so we have plenty of villains and shadowy characters to continue the plot.
This at least slowed down from the last chapter, which had an enormous amount of action, and I found the pacing here to be much more comfortable.
I'm a little confused about the appearance of Daredevil here – he seems to have no particular purpose in this chapter, other than giving Spider-man an opening for one really tacky comment. I know sometimes things happen for no reason in real life, but other than reminding us that Daredevil is still alive and kicking, I don't know why he was here. Unless there's a tie-in to a future chapter....
Anyway, this was a pretty good wrap-up, while leaving enough loose ends for a continuation. I notice the verb tense changes are non-existant, so that's one problem that's apparently been solved. Nice job!
This at least slowed down from the last chapter, which had an enormous amount of action, and I found the pacing here to be much more comfortable.
I'm a little confused about the appearance of Daredevil here – he seems to have no particular purpose in this chapter, other than giving Spider-man an opening for one really tacky comment. I know sometimes things happen for no reason in real life, but other than reminding us that Daredevil is still alive and kicking, I don't know why he was here. Unless there's a tie-in to a future chapter....
You know what? Forget what I said about Daredevil in my last post, man, I'm going to thump Spider-man for that nickname. (I mean, that is kinda tasteless, Ice. It may be in keeping with Peter's older self, but still.... :roll: )
Were I Peter, I would find this rather alarming. This suggests that someone knows Spider-man and Peter are the same person. Otherwise, what's the point of hurting Peter's friends?
What an enlightened prison. They let people have not only paper, but sharp writing implements.... :lol:
Anyway, this was a pretty good wrap-up, while leaving enough loose ends for a continuation. I notice the verb tense changes are non-existant, so that's one problem that's apparently been solved. Nice job!
