TheManWithoutFear said:
So... what exactly happened?
Yeeesh, I write a long and not-all-that-spoilery review and he wants a spoiler synopsis.
Okay - the issue opens back in the thick of the fight between the Kree and the Skrull over Hulking. Patriot's been shot (last issue he stepped in front of Captain America - you know, the guy with the shield that could TAKE the blast) and Cap calls Sentry to fly Patriot off to the hospital.
Cap orders the Young Avengers off the "battle field" with pretty predictable results - a big double splash of the Young Avengers and New Avengers going into the fight together, with Captain America and Hulking both saying "Avengers Assemble!"
The we get 6 pages (3 double spreads) with everyone in battle on the left and multiple panels of the Young Avengers interacting with the New Avengers on the right.
Cassie "saves" a wise-cracking Spider-Man from being mobbed by Skrulls "A little help? I'm being skrulled alive over here!" by turning giant and plucking him out of the mob. They have a cute conversation about Spidey being a science nerd.
Kate Bishop saves Spider-Woman from being shot by firing arrows at several armed Skrulls, and Spider-Woman calls her "Hawkeye." Kate says "I'm no Hawkeye" and Spider-Woman disagrees (which is bizarre, because Spider-Woman barely knew Hawkeye).
Speedster Tommy sees Wolverine kill a Skrull (his claws are sticking out the other side of the Skrulls chest, covered with green goo), and says that he thought Avengers weren't supposed to kill. Logan says: "Relax, Junior. They're Skrulls. They'll grow back. Eventually." This pleases Tommy to know end and he literally beats the stuffing out of one, which causes Logan to say: "You're sick, kid. I like it."
Cap, of course, can't let all this mayhem go un-tsked at, and comes over to admonish them. He calls Tommy "Billy" and Billy, coming up behind him, explains that it's his twin brother Tommy, and then explains that he thinks they are the Scarlet Witch's children.
Cut to Iron Man, who is lecturing Vision about not staying in the lab like a good little android, as Iron Man told him to. Vision pretty much tells him to kiss off, but it much nicer language.
Luke Cage and Hulking are fighting together, and Hulking tells him that he's just "this year's excuse" for the Skrull vs Kree stuff, and then a bunch of Kree fly down and pluck Hulking up into the sky. The Super Skrull goes up to him, both sides are shooting at them, and Hulking comes up with A Cunning Plan (which they don't share with us, the readers.)
Next page, we're all down on the ground, and Cap, Iron Man, Kree and Skrull are hammering out a visitation agreement, where Hulking will spend half the year with the Kree and half the year with the Skrulls and have lots of earth visitation privileges in the meantime. Hulking says goodbye to all his friends, including a stunned Billy, and the Kree and the Skrull leave with Hulking, leaving a very sad Young Avengers team, most of the New Avengers and the Super Skrull.
Wolverine is not fooled, however, (or at least his nose isn't) and calls the bluff. The Super Skrull is actually Hulking and the Super Skrull has taken Hulking's place with the Kree. Many hugs all the way around. [See my comment in the review about what is going to happen when the Kree come back after figuring out the substitution, totally ticked off.]
Everyone rushes to the hospital to see Patriot, who is in the process of getting a blood transfusion from his grandfather Isaiah, who is a product of the supersoldier program. It's left for us to assume that Eli is now superpowered (or super-serumed, anyway) as a result.
Cut to the hospital lobby, where Cap's trying to tell them that they need to give up this dream, and Kate Bishop lays into him and tells him that if he'd helped them in the first place, trained them as he should have, a lot of inevitable mayhem could have been prevented, and tells him there is no way they'll stop.
Fast forward some period of time, and the last scene is at the ruined Avengers Mansion, where the Young Avengers (Kate Bishop, Hulking, Patriot, Wiccan and Stature) have convened to hold a memorial service for Teddy's "mother" - they're all busy putting the ruined memorial statues back together. Vision explains that he did some arm twisting to make sure they could be there, and the YA are scoping out the grounds for their clubhouse. [Yeah, that's not going to happen.] They all tell Hulking he looks a lot like his father, Captain Marvel, Wiccan makes a statue of Cassie's father since he doesn't have a memorial statue in the garden. A very pregnant Jessica Jones shows up, and gives Kate a note from Captain America that says "For Hawkeye" and then hands Kate Hawkeye's bow, quiver and arrows, saying that Cap told her, even if she wasn't an archer, she reminded him of Hawkeye in that he was the only person who ever stood up to Cap the way she had earlier. So Kate is Hawkeye 2 now. Then Teddy spreads his mother's ashes and everyone has a beautiful little cry together.
Billy talks about going to look for his mother (who, Cassie points out, killed her father) and they comment that Tommy didn't want to stick around, even though they had a costume and a codename for him. There is a huge "boom" in the distance, which it turns out Tommy is responsible for and he zips onto the scene in his new greeen costume and calls himself "Speed" and explains that he's been fighting the Zodiac over by the UN and he needs Billy to come and magically repair the UN building and help him take down the bad guys. Patriot objects a bit, they smash his objections down and the last full splash is the team, running into action, with Hulking saying "I can't wait to see what comes next."
There, spoilery summary. To see some of the pages, go here:
http://community.livejournal.com/scans_daily/2070160.html#cutid1